Sandusky Gets a Minimum of 30 Years

From this morning's Wall Street Journal, I found the quote from Judge John Cleland to hit it exactly. Like Sandusky, RND took pleasure and satisfaction not only in the physical abuse but also in the manipulation of so many young hearts and souls, often under the noses of their parents.

"The tragedy of this crime is that it's a story of betrayal," Judge Cleland said before handing down the sentence in Centre County Court. "Those who have never encountered a pedophile can hardly begin to understand the anguish of those who have been so expertly deceived.…The crime is not only what you did to their bodies but what you did to their psyches and souls."

If you were abused by RND and the statute of limitations has not expired, please consider a criminal action against him. For me at least, he is not entitled to my forgiveness.

And still more...

An anonymous post just arrived.  This time from a man in France who was abused by RND in the mid-70s and who knew other kids who were similarly abused.


What astonishes me is how this blog continues to bring in others who were abused by Richard Neville Davis.  Other men from New England, the UK, and now France.  I can only assume that they've found this particular blog because they've done a search on the name of their abuser and found this site.  Here we are, thirty and forty years later, wondering about the fate of the man who did so much damage.  


How I wish the authorities, somewhere, could do something.  And how I wish real consequences were enforced.  An abuser here in Massachusetts just received ten years probation for his crimes.  That is far too lenient given the damage.

Now That Sandusky is Convicted

To those abused by Sandusky, Davis, and all the other predators, I write the following letter. This post is also a response to both the Sandusky conviction and a recent comment from Anonymous who read John's post from the early phases of the Sandusky affair.

As I say below, if only we had some way of reaching our abuser with a similar conviction.  He's hidden by the statute of limitations and a murky trail of residence in Massachusetts.  

It's my prayer that all of us find healing and peace.

= = = = = 

Dear Anonymous,

Thank you for coming by and leaving your post.  I appreciate it.

I'm writing the day after Sandusky was convicted of, what, 45 counts? Given the number of accusers, I had no doubt that he would be found guilty.  Where there's that much smoke, we know there's fire.  How sad, and hardly surprising, that his adopted son came forward, once the jury started to deliberate, to say that he too was burned.  

Our abuser, and I how I wish I could see him convicted, is a serial abuser who victimized scores, if not hundreds, of boys.  Likewise, we will probably never know how many boys Sandusky assaulted.  I hope that his conviction gives you, in a small way, some comfort that at least some of these monsters get caught.  Never often enough and never in time to protect those of us who have been abused.

Reading your post, I know very well the lifelong impact of what happened to you.  And I know that feeling of brokenness.  As I look at my life, so many choices I've made or reactions I've had to different situations, stem from the abuse.  

But let me leave one message.  Never stop seeking to heal because it is possible.  It is possible to do more than just endure the pain.  It took me over 40 years.  It took different paths, it took different healers.  Perhaps the distance of time helped a little.  I don't know.  But I do know that, at last, I no longer feel broken in my soul.  And I do know that, amidst the inevitable troubles, life will bring moments of sweetness, love, and peace in our hearts.  Never lose hope, live in the knowledge you will heal.  Because you will.

Healing does not mean forgetting your pain, putting it "all behind you."  It doesn't mean forgetting your anger or even have to include forgiveness, except for yourself.  It was never about you, never your fault.  For me, it's become like a scar, one that's healed, knitting together the broken pieces in a unique, maybe odd, pattern.  But like a scar, its become part of who I am and, with effort and some luck, I'm here at a place where I actually like myself, warts, dings, bent parts, bruises, broken bits, and all, because the sum of it all is me.  I am no longer only a victim living with an open wound.  I am me.

That's what I wish for you.  May it come to you soon.

Again, thanks for coming by and lending your voice.

Peace, my friend.

George